The Karate Kid
For the inagural Man Movie review of the week I will start with one of my all time favorite movies, and that is The Karate Kid. Now some might question whether or not this movie constitutes a "Man Movie," although there are plenty of elements throughout this classic film that scream manliness. In one of Ralph Macchios one, and I hate to say only films of significance, he preforms brilliantly for a boy troubled with the issues of high school and what seems to be puberty.
Now from the beginning act of this movie, many would stand and wonder what about this movie truely makes you feel like a man while watching. Well I state this fact, it's the smooth moves of Macchio's character Daniel on the beach doing his best to hit on the young female character Ali Mills played by the beautiful Elisabeth Shue, and his fateful introduction to Johnny Lawrence and his gang of Cobra Ki warriors that start out one of the great protagonist vs antagonist stories of our time.
I will start out with what works in this movie to begin. First off there might not be any group of young men more manly that that of the Cobra Ki dojo warriors led by their young leader Johnny Lawrence. As Johnny and his gang of hoodlums harrass poor Daniel Larusso, a young misled boy from Jersey, one gets the manly sense of rooting for the members of Cobra Ki because they are true men. Although as the movie progresses, the pussy that is Daniel Larusso meets a mysterious Asian man known only as Mr. Miyagi, and his life is forever changed. The audience is left to be intrigued as Macchio's character is tested through grueling chores that his mysterious Manly Master Miyagi puts him through in order to secretly train him in the historic arts of karate. The bewildered Daniel begins to wonder why he has basically become this old Asian's bitch all of a sudden when the bullies that plague him continue to man up in the Kobra Ki Dojo...? But here in lies the true manliness of the movie, two lonely and troubled human beings who both happen to be males, find each other and give each other a special gift that each was lacking before. For Daniel its a path to beat pussyness, and for Miyagi it is a young boy he can teach karate, and probably later molest. I will progress past most of the movie because the major reason that I love this movie is because of the final karate championship scene that occurs in the All Valley Karate Championship. I invite you to go to the link below and see for yourself what truely defines being a man, and that is being "The Best Around"
This mighty musical montage by Joe Esposito is the perfect portrait of the males journey from a pussy to a real MAN, thats right Daniel Larusso, flamingo kick and all you are a MAN. While it might be true that this scene is the only true reason why I watch this movie, I cannot help but feel like more of a man after seeing the entire movie.
Well on to what I did not like about the movie. Well as I just mentioned above, pretty much the entire movie is slow and uninspiring until the final bell tolls in the last scence. I cannot help looking at Macchios character Daniel and thinking he is at least 10 years younger than Johnny Lawrence and his band of bullies. This unrealistic comparison between the protagonist and antagonist really chaps my butt. In any real life situation between the two men, Johnny would wipe the floor with Macchio's bitch ass. I also really hate the character of Daniel's mother. This South Jersey guido really got on my nerves the entire movie and would really take away any true maniless from any male child she mothered. Although she was in very few scenes in the movie, I would have taken her out of the movie completely.
Final thoughts:
Well on a scale from 1 to 10 I give The Karate Kid a stagering 7 in the score of manliness. The reason for such an average score is the lack of real grunting, beer drinking, blood spilling maniless that all we men truely strive for in a movie. Although it still scores highly mainly for the final scene alone, and the song that accompanies it.
I give Ralph Macchios character a 3 out of 10 on the manliness scale because even though he wins in the end, I know I could kick his ass easily.
My favorite character in the movie Johnny Lawrence scores a high 9 out of 10 on this manliness scale for his amazing acting job as a high school bully, his exquisite Halloween costume, and his aura of Ass kickingness throughout the movie. He also scores highly for the good sportsmanship he shows in the end by befriending young Larusso.
Quote of the Movie : "Put him in a body bag Johnny!!!" This is a quote that you have to listen closely to hear, but it occurs during the final fight scene between Johnny Lawrence and Daniel Larusso. This is one of the more witty quotes to come out of a young man's mouth, and because of it I have felt more like a man when I repeat it.
Overall this is not as manly as other movies out there, but its more of a heartfelt manliness that is felt after the movie that makes me enjoy it so much.
Stay tuned for more of the King's wisdom as I review my next Man Movie after thoroughly watching next Friday.
Now from the beginning act of this movie, many would stand and wonder what about this movie truely makes you feel like a man while watching. Well I state this fact, it's the smooth moves of Macchio's character Daniel on the beach doing his best to hit on the young female character Ali Mills played by the beautiful Elisabeth Shue, and his fateful introduction to Johnny Lawrence and his gang of Cobra Ki warriors that start out one of the great protagonist vs antagonist stories of our time.
I will start out with what works in this movie to begin. First off there might not be any group of young men more manly that that of the Cobra Ki dojo warriors led by their young leader Johnny Lawrence. As Johnny and his gang of hoodlums harrass poor Daniel Larusso, a young misled boy from Jersey, one gets the manly sense of rooting for the members of Cobra Ki because they are true men. Although as the movie progresses, the pussy that is Daniel Larusso meets a mysterious Asian man known only as Mr. Miyagi, and his life is forever changed. The audience is left to be intrigued as Macchio's character is tested through grueling chores that his mysterious Manly Master Miyagi puts him through in order to secretly train him in the historic arts of karate. The bewildered Daniel begins to wonder why he has basically become this old Asian's bitch all of a sudden when the bullies that plague him continue to man up in the Kobra Ki Dojo...? But here in lies the true manliness of the movie, two lonely and troubled human beings who both happen to be males, find each other and give each other a special gift that each was lacking before. For Daniel its a path to beat pussyness, and for Miyagi it is a young boy he can teach karate, and probably later molest. I will progress past most of the movie because the major reason that I love this movie is because of the final karate championship scene that occurs in the All Valley Karate Championship. I invite you to go to the link below and see for yourself what truely defines being a man, and that is being "The Best Around"
This mighty musical montage by Joe Esposito is the perfect portrait of the males journey from a pussy to a real MAN, thats right Daniel Larusso, flamingo kick and all you are a MAN. While it might be true that this scene is the only true reason why I watch this movie, I cannot help but feel like more of a man after seeing the entire movie.
Well on to what I did not like about the movie. Well as I just mentioned above, pretty much the entire movie is slow and uninspiring until the final bell tolls in the last scence. I cannot help looking at Macchios character Daniel and thinking he is at least 10 years younger than Johnny Lawrence and his band of bullies. This unrealistic comparison between the protagonist and antagonist really chaps my butt. In any real life situation between the two men, Johnny would wipe the floor with Macchio's bitch ass. I also really hate the character of Daniel's mother. This South Jersey guido really got on my nerves the entire movie and would really take away any true maniless from any male child she mothered. Although she was in very few scenes in the movie, I would have taken her out of the movie completely.
Final thoughts:
Well on a scale from 1 to 10 I give The Karate Kid a stagering 7 in the score of manliness. The reason for such an average score is the lack of real grunting, beer drinking, blood spilling maniless that all we men truely strive for in a movie. Although it still scores highly mainly for the final scene alone, and the song that accompanies it.
I give Ralph Macchios character a 3 out of 10 on the manliness scale because even though he wins in the end, I know I could kick his ass easily.
My favorite character in the movie Johnny Lawrence scores a high 9 out of 10 on this manliness scale for his amazing acting job as a high school bully, his exquisite Halloween costume, and his aura of Ass kickingness throughout the movie. He also scores highly for the good sportsmanship he shows in the end by befriending young Larusso.
Quote of the Movie : "Put him in a body bag Johnny!!!" This is a quote that you have to listen closely to hear, but it occurs during the final fight scene between Johnny Lawrence and Daniel Larusso. This is one of the more witty quotes to come out of a young man's mouth, and because of it I have felt more like a man when I repeat it.
Overall this is not as manly as other movies out there, but its more of a heartfelt manliness that is felt after the movie that makes me enjoy it so much.
Stay tuned for more of the King's wisdom as I review my next Man Movie after thoroughly watching next Friday.
1 comment:
wax on, wax off, ralph would wax your ass if he read this devinny
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